This song was released one year ago today

I have had problem with the lyrics Take me to church
because I have come to grown up from believing to be a non believer..

It was somewhere when I was at sunday school as a 5yearold I think because the tale of the fish and bread that magically was enough to feed the thousands listening to Jesus speech at some mountain.

But I checked the lyrics to Hozier song and there saw the comments of the music video and in an interview Hozier himself has said that the song is about taking a distance from the Irish church and the hate crime against homosexuals. Love is for everyone. No matter who you are, where you´re from you should be loved.

There goes the text, thou shalt not have other Gods than me, written by a human author in the Bible(book of books) sometime in the 13th century as Gutenberg had invented printing books.
So there are other Gods then to choose from? I'm glad for that. I like the mythologies that have all kinds of Gods for every human behavior. In greek, hindu, northern Asatro and the Finnish Kalevala. 

One year ago I was at the beginning class of Buddhist meditation, which I found satisfying because it is the telling of wisdom that have been pondering on from 4000years ago by men mostly. To sit and breathe and think well of one and all. Its like affirmation that I first heard of on the Oprah Winfrey show actually. Is the affirmation word borrowed from the buddhist community?  

Come to think of it it might have been Metallica Enter Sandman lyrics that turned me from listening to prayers because as the lyrics goes "never mind that noice you heard" to the child praying. And at the same time Madonnas Prayer was also my favorite song as I grew up but I thought the name of the song was more like "take me there..."

Ted Talk "loose transcript" Andrew Solomon

  Andrew Solomon - Depression, the secret we share. (Shows pictures of famous persons that had depression Emily Dickinson, Goya, ) 1991 mother died, relationship dead, 3 years later, did not want to do anything. - Everything to do seem like to much to do. Instead of feel good to have friends what alot to do. Difficult to eat. You know it is ridiculous to be depressed. Feel myself doing less, thinking less. Then anxiety. If you told a month only. A sensation of being afraid all the time. Too painful to be alive. Lay in bed thinking something is wrong. Finally the phone rang. His Father rang him. Who am I if I cannot be myself? What if the medication do me someone else. There be something. Merge and relapsed. Have to be in therapy for life. Is it philosophical or...
The treatment is a disaster, I hope in the future. No thing of love without desprair. Depression, grief and sadness. Loss, six months later feel better it is grief. If loss and still at a loss six month later, then it is depression.
Andrew Solomon interviewed depression people. It is a serious thing.
Lithium without the medicin she katatonic. I was singing to myself Where have all the flowers gone over and over to get the voice out of your head. - Think about killin self.
Thats true but I think what to focus about now is what to have for breakfast.
Play videogame an hour. The healthy thought killing more than the depressed group thought of killin little monsters.
A husband and wife hiding their depression to eachother. Hiding medication in different places in the same
If u have braincancer.
If you feel better you get better from depression.
How medication - making little things from yarn helped a woman. (Look out if she had OCD too)
Rwanda, westafrica, east africa - Treatment - take the people into sunshine and music and community, no the westernes just took them to a room and make them talk about bad things in this damp room.
A woman of 7children just laid on the bed, covers over her head, abusive husband. 6months later she is single mother can help the kids with their homework, she got happier kids and says: I asked the lord to send me an angel and he did, she said.
Think it through. What is the mechanism of resillience? Those who hide from it get worse. Those who have it. Im glad to have been in hospital 40times. Learned to give all the things I need. Have found a soul inside myself says Andrew Solomon. Found a way to love my depression, to cling to the reasons for living.

Steve Job's Advice

(Me, Linda, have collected what I think is the essence from Jobs famously Stanford speech 2005)

Connect the dots (på svenska se sammanhang)
You can only connect the dots
                  looking backwards
Start over Love what you do
the only way to do great work is
love what you do
So keep looking - Don´t settle
Tell yourself is this what I would like to do
for the rest of my days?
Am I happy with now?
Can I change it?
What is better than this?
If this is it. This is the last day.
Stay hungry
     Stay focused
Would you like to do what you do today?
Do what you love to do
Don't compromise.
Do what you love to do.
Follow your heart and intuition,
they somehow know what you want to do.
 -Get over it and start all over again.

A fresh start.