Let's hope for getting better each year

Happy new Year!

Steve Job's Advice

(Me, Linda, have collected what I think is the essence from Jobs famously Stanford speech 2005)

Connect the dots (på svenska se sammanhang)
You can only connect the dots
                  looking backwards
Start over Love what you do
the only way to do great work is
love what you do
So keep looking - Don´t settle
Tell yourself is this what I would like to do
for the rest of my days?
Am I happy with now?
Can I change it?
What is better than this?
If this is it. This is the last day.
Stay hungry
     Stay focused
Would you like to do what you do today?
Do what you love to do
Don't compromise.
Do what you love to do.
Follow your heart and intuition,
they somehow know what you want to do.
 -Get over it and start all over again.

A fresh start.

- Correct translations pictionary app? does it exist already?

for example  _the same picture for illustrate the meaning of the word. (Substantiv)

tuoli, chair, stol, le chair  maybe make own drawings to the word

match, kiss, suudella, puss  for education purposes eh?

table, bord, le table, pöytä  student get to spell correctly

kissa, cat, le chat, die katze, katt  maybe a voice attached to the word also
dog, chien, hund, das hund, koira 
skola, die schule, koulu, school
gå till skolan, mennä kouluun, go to school, die schule zugehen, avants le schole, avanti il scuola,
studera, studieren, study, opiin, studiare
The thing with languages is that they are all from different beginnings, but at the ultimate beginning maybe there was only one language?
Since Babels tower according to the Bible we have different languages but somehow they work together/ make sense/ have some similarities and through the years, centuries, millennias the languages has merged into eachother, the travellers have brought words and with new discoveries new words are made up. Today with the interweb internet thing language seem to get globally connected in a very fast pace compared to the old days, like only 30 years/50 years ago before the personal computer was invented, before the internet was made public, before the computer age.
I don't think the youth today know how to appreciate this marvellous world that we are living in. I am so lucky to have grown up before the computer age. I was outdoors playing with my best friends and I think back at those days as the happy time in my life. You are young only one time. If I get kids someday I will love them unconditionally and let them be kids for as long as possible. I will not give them technology before they are old enough. I will let them live in the real world where the grass is green in the spring, snow is white in wintertime, trees all colours in the autumn and in the summer the children may swim in the blue ocean.
   And that's all I got for you now. I have to get my essae written today. And hold the line open for phonecalls about work.

 Sketch 1 and 2 Idea

 Illustration 3 and 4 of idea

In thrapy 3 loneliness

- I feel so lonely, it's like noone cares about me.
- How do you mean?
- Everyone got someone to rely on but me. My friends got kids and familys of their own, I'm just a single     woman with not much friends.
- But you got friends and still feel alone?
- Yes, its that point when I sit alone in my room in the evening and I feel that something is missing. I so would want to have a kid to care for.
- In  that moment of loneliness what do you do? What are you thinking about?
- I get sad and put on some music, then I hear in the song someone else have this same feeling as I have. So I figure out that I am not so alone after all. Its a human feeling.
- Yes thats right. Its a human feeling to like to be a part of the society and community. Of course you look to the friend with a child when you don't have one. She can be secretly looking at you too and miss the time when she was so free to do anything because you ought to know that with children comes obligations.
- I would like that to have the child to care for, to have the obligation towards another small being, a part of me it should be. Or any other child in the world. Just someone to care for, perhaps an animal. I just don't understand the people that choose not to have kids because kids are the joy of life.
- Mhm, so having a kid would help you from loneliness. What if you cant have children? And if you dont meet "the right one"?
- Thats when I get sad. What if I will never be able to have what I wish to have.
- What if anything is possible?
- How?
- All you have to have is the Will and the Word. Go on make a wish and it will come true.

Yester years shrooms

2009 was a good year to pick some golden mushrooms from the forest. Kantarell och Trattkantarell/ Höstkantarell You pick the mushrooms thats familiar so you know for sure its edible. I haven't had the time to go yet this season, but I know where they are, or where they should be. Part of looking for goodies in the forest is just to enjoy being back to nature.

Today, let it be a good day

Great day for america! Eh, Irony. I see in the news the political game that is going on. The government of US is very special. The president has not the power but the house of parliament does? The US had a shutdown in 1995 too, during Bill Clinton rule. Shutdown, I believe would never occur in Sweden. We have a different system. The budget has gone through some debate of course but no disagreement in the Riksdagen would get the Swedish government to shut down.
   Of course we have high tax that every citizen dutifully pays in to the government through the "moms" that is on every item we buy. It´s a good thing to have tax because the money goes to hospital, social services, school, police, government. And then theres the one krona that goes to the king of Sweden aswell, he tends to the history of the old country.
   It seems that most of the countries in the world has money debts, taking loans to pay for this and that. And luckily the most money are just numbers on a datascreen. If the money was printed out there would soon be shortage of cotton or trees or whatever money are made of. The solution for future society seem to be fleemarkets, garagesales, trading things person to person, visit the farm to buy milk and cheese by trading a shirt or knitted hat. (In China there is a rule to not build below 37 stories high buildings becoz of the increasing population. I wonder how they would get to the farm on daily basis, countryside or forest when its so many people crammed into one spot?)

   I'm wondering where the grass is greener?

Ten years ago (September 10. 2003)

Ten years ago (September 10. 2003)
I was this day on a square in Stockholm called Medborgarplatsen. The politicians Socialdemokraterna had the spotlight, took the stage did a woman called Anna Lindh, she talked for a while to introduce the now former statsminister Göran Persson. They talked about voting Yes for the Euro (money).
I don't remember much of what was said. I only went there because my boyfriend wanted to see and he is totally Yes Euro. "Solidaritet" is often mentioned by that party Socialdemokraterna, I think it means You have to be a good neighbour; stand by someone in hard times; show love to the poor(not quite, to anybody?). Let's say I didn't understand much of what was said, although I was impressed by Anna Lindh, that a woman (with glasses like me) could be talking important matters next to the primeminister of Sweden Göran Persson(whom my father was a great fan of). I remember Anna Lindh, her smile and handshake.

The next day on the train on my way to school, I got a sms saying the news that Anna Lindh is dead. I was stunned, in chock that day. When I got to class we got the message that class would not be cancelled but at 12 o'clock we could go to the aula to watch the primeminister speech on TV. Teareyed Göran Persson.

Today
The news have shown remembering programs all weekend of Anna Lindh, who was stabbed to death September 11, 2003. She has done alot of good for women in the land that doesn´t exist(Kurdistan, somewhere within the drawn lines of Turkey, Iran, Iraq and Syria). She could have done alot of more if she had lived on, but now she only lives on in the memories we keep.
(Sweden voted No to Euro(money). Swedish krona seem to be doing alright today. Ten years later and no female Primeminister of Sweden yet).

mandela and forgiveness

DT - One thing Keep remembering. Evil is an abbrevation. You get upset when a     woman get abused

CF - Yes, you look at me as if I dont?

DT - At Darfur its one of the most awful places worst place, met with refugees, talked with them, they could laugh. the men who Nurse white robes, clean, spotless.

CF - Where do they get the water?

DT - Part of it there are trucks. If the women go out of the camp the women get raped.

CF - What?

DT - Human beings are incredible. I mean you are incredible

CF - The thing I was gonna uh

DT - The second thing.. shh

CF - Oh yeye no you're right, you're good

DT - ..incredible thing, The humanitarian workers. Have we hear enough craze of fantastic people, many of them go their second, third mission. What make them go there? They get no kudos. They can't live normal life if they don't go

CF - Is that why you hang on to the faith? When you see such evil, is it a test of your faith?

DT - It is that Evil is evil. You can't seek to the ghastliness when people put others into gaschambers.

CF - ye..

DT - I mean that is awful there is no word had good enough to describe the level of Evil, I mean in the Truth and Reconcilation commission we had some gruesome accounts. Somebody said we gave him drug coffe, we shot him in the head, and then we burned his body, it takes 7-8hour for a human body to burn completely. And so whilst the body is burning here we're having a barbeque here drinking beer and laughing and there the human body burnin and here cowflesh burnin and you say what could have happened o the humanity of anyone that they could sink so low Had a barbeque next to that.

CF - What could have happened and How do you find reconciliation, how do you find forgiveness in that? It must be its a gigantic tragedy.

DT - It is and yet have met Not just black people, white people too, who had this incredible, One woman was with friends at a X-mas party at a golfclub, and one of the liberation movements threw handgrenades into the party and Several people were killed, she wasnt killed but she was so badly wounded she was in ICU for several months now She is talkin she says she couldn't when she came out, she couldn't wash herself, she couldnt cloth herself, she couldn't feed herself, it was done for her by her children and then she says. I mean a condition that leaves her
Totally hopeless. She said It has Enriched my life. I mean, enriched my life, This woman crazy

CF - It's very advanced for me, I dont get it

DT - And Then she says I'd like to meet the perpertrator. I'd like to meet him in the spirit of forgiveness. I'd like to forgive him and I hope he forgives me.

CF - Is that the only way to freedom? I remember something about Hearing the Dalai Lama talking about he Felt he was in danger with the chinese because he felt himself loosing compassion for them, which I really didn't understand at the time, but it sounds a little bit like your saying. .

DT - The thing is that you and I, and all of us. Even when we don't accept it I mean or understand. It is that God created us in such a way that I can't be human on my own. I wouldn't know how to walk as a human being, I wouldn't know how to think, I wouldn't know how to speak, I wouldn't know how to be a human being Except through learning from other human being. and so our humanity is bound with one another. And you see If you carry out a policy that dehumanizes others in the process you are dehumanized, you know and so you understand now, you understand how others can say in order for me to be me, I want to forgive you. Because, have you discovered? When you don't forgive frequently, you feel it in you tumtum

CF - Ye I always was told that resentment was like drinking poison and then excepting someone else to die, you know that has...

DT - That was beautiful

CF - Thank you very much its not mine. Father Tutu, we must take a break.
((It was a Quote from Nelson Mandela))

Transcripted from an Episode of Craig Ferguson Late Show with guest Desmond Tutu. Check it out on youtube if you wish. I own nothing.

Weekly update

I thought I go out to get entertained by some culture last week.
STOFF arrangemang in Stockholm. John Malkovich has been to Sthlm Sweden and performed a horror story with teathre. - I did not go I'm sorry, but I felt it to be a 'too evil to my stomach' show. (Real reason: it was sold out)
Then I was supposed to demonstrate against the chemicals, the GMO company, the Manolo- monolo- Mo ma mo.. some bad guy with power that should not be allowed to throw pesticides on our crops/ vegetables/ green green grass. - I did not go to demonstrate becoz I forgot about it.. (thought it was today, when it was yesterday).

What I did do last week out of the ordinary: I lost 1,7kg with the WeightWatcher helping program. I made a real good recipe from their cookbook, a Chickenstew with Mango.
And for dessert I got to adjust a chocolate cake recipe and made my own homecooked cherry-marmalade to the cake filling. Its yummie.
   After have read some upsetting news I went for a walk , got to the lake, sat down on the rock nearest to the water and wrote down my anger towards the ignorant powerful people and about everything that does not work, threw the note into the water and felt so much better. (No, not really I saved my notes so that I may share them after I've done some more research..)

Some people just have that look about them

This day I took the bicycle to the store, I had a package to leave at the post office and some food to buy. (Posten- the post-office in Sweden is inside food-stores nowadays). I rang the bell and I saw him come towards me. He was working today. I felt the awkwardness come creeping in. He recognized me (I saw it in his eyes), he took the parcel and looked at the weight of it. I asked if I could get an A-prioritaire mark for that. It comes in the post tomorrow anyway, he says. (Its the same country post, dumb girl). But you need another poststamp. Oh I don't got one with me. He looks at me, writes the cost on a piece of paper. Show this to register cashier personal, I will put another stamp on your letter and see that it goes, he says and smiles. I thank him and walk away, I have still the grocerylist to go through firstly, hope I remember the note. Yeah. I did my shopping in a hurry, to get out, to get some air, to breathe.
  What more can I have said to him? Smiled more and winked maybe? I did do that, didn't I? I could have stood still and watched him get that extra poststamp on the parcel, letter/thing. Waited for something more? I trust him. Some people just have that look about them. Comfort, warmth, hot-blooded type, that searching eyes. Should I have said something more? Wondering still.

in thrpy 2

- Trust issues. I don't trust anybody. That's my problem.
- So you rather sit at home alone instead of going out?
- Because I've been there and done that. I've seen it all.
- Very good, and don't you wish to experience it all again?
- Oh yes I do. And No, I want to do something different. Now I can do something different because I know what happened last time..
  I won't drink too much at a party and fall asleep in the snow afterwards.
- Yes, you were so lucky that the ambulance got to you in time.
- You know what? I have no recollection of that. I know I woke up in a hospitalbed and I was so surprised by it. The last thing I remember was talking about Jim Carrey films by the dinnertable with some guys. I don't even remember going out of her apartment.
- Mhmh. Well you're not alone, this is something that happens to alot of people.
- What do you say? I am not alot of people. I am the good daughter. Why are you making me angry?
- Its natural to feel.. What is it you feel? Disappointed, at your "perfect image". You are only human, my darling dear. And superstition is normal. Everyone has trust issues, every body hurts

Go out and have some fun again, but be careful with your drinking.

learning from TED

I have had the chance to find out about Ted talk a couple of years ago and get inspired of most of them if its my kind of subject, I have enjoyed many these TED talks even those that have a similarity to TEDtalks but done years prior like where John Cleese talk about Creativity and when Douglas Adams talked about Parrots, the universe and everything (it was on YT)
I saw this TED talk on YT today, its only 3minute long talk called the Secret of Success in 8words.
PASSION. - Do it for love. 
WORK, have fun- Work o frolics. 
Be GOOD at what you do. Practice practice practice. 
FOCUS on one thing. 
PUSH yourself- make them selfdoubts go away. Mom pushed me. 
SERVE, a privilege to serve others. Values 
IDEAS. Listen, Observe, be curious ask questions, problem solve, make connections 
PERSIST le failure. All that  C.R.A.P. (criticism, rejection, assholes, pressure) 

On the female front in TED talks a woman talked about Ask questions She started the Crowdfunding for her music band, very inspiring lady to me. 

   Margaret Hefferman about Dare to disagree. I'm a shy person so I learned some I need to practice on. See constructive conflict Agree to disagree. Different background, discipline and experinece. Require alot of patience and energy. Only if you really care you will do that. Biggest disaster come from organisations. How do organisations think? They dont they cant think because the people inside of them being afraid of raise a conflict. She gave an example of that and as the closing sentence Margaret said -Openness isn't the end it is the beginning.

   A third woman to mention from TED talks is Jill Taylor Bolte who had a Stroke, being a brain scientist/researcher professional she did a very good anecdote and entertaining, educating speech. I made a hoppity attempt to transcript some of her saying, but I guess if you´re into learning about left and right, its better to see Jill on YT for yourself. 

Brother with Schizophrenia only make introvert, not participate with the world like normal. Research during the day and .. A blood vessel exploded. Could not walk, talk or think in right -parallell procesoor -left serial processor different personalities and think about different think. 

 Right side of brain pictures and kinestetic. present moment look like and right hemisphere energy. Brothers and sisters we are perfect. 

 Left hemisphere is linear, all about the past and the future. pick up details, the details associates it with all we learned, think in language. Left side reminds doin laundry I am, I am. Become separate from the energyfield in the right side. The feeling of stroke. looking focused on inner system. lost balance. look on the arm, cant define the boundaries only see energy. 

  The left side shut down. Leftside got back online, we got a problem. 

Right side brain being in LaLa land. All relationships gone when 37y emotional bagage. 

Left brain got back I gotta get to world. Right phone This is Stroke All pixels. 45min. Going to Lala land. Golden Retriever... A little while later, hospital ambulance. Energy lift, spirit surrender. No more choreographer of my life. Chocked to be alive. Loud chaotic sound. Lights too bright, felt enourmous and ... Remember cannot squeeze my enourmousness into that small body, I've found Nirvana. Compassionate people, purposedly choose to go to that semisphere. Motivated to live again. 8 years to recover. The lifeforce of the universe. I Have the power to choose what I want to be. Or choose to be single solid separated from the crowd. The we inside of me. Which do you choose and when? More peaceful in the right hemisphere, thats why an idea is worth spreading.

And thats all TED talks are about being a bit T? Educational Inspiring. (I don't remember what the T stands for, technic, teaching?) Anyways, have to go to bed now. Its 11pm and I got an early start to-morrow. Cheers

How about a moodboard?

I've heard of this dreamboard through Oprah, TV-show I've even made an attempt to do my own kind of dream board.
Now recently I've heard about this moodboard. Its used by designers when they want to style a room or something. The idea of it is apparently that helps others to 'get inside our heads' in order to convey a thematic setting for a design or to explain function in piece of work. The mood board is used to get the right feeling for the livingroom or kitchen you want to decorate.
My work in progress.

(Although to me it sounded like a mood board should be about showing how one's week has been. Did I feel happy or sad this day? The mood board could be a Good tool in therapy I imagine. I don't know anything about decorating myself,  I'm more into human feelings.)

I follow the news

I'm not surprised when I read about the surveillance from USA, Snowdens telling have made France  admit to their collecting although lesser than the UK. Since I read 1984, the book about Big Brother, I've felt that the cameras are everywhere, and aren they?
I got upset about the freightrain in Canada. It saddening, a small society have lost someone they know. Protesters stood June 28. to stop the train from passing through Canada, 4 of them persons got arrested.
One notice in the news brought me joy. I found out about gardening surrogacy. How one can support a vegetable from a far and then get it transported home, good business idea I thought to myself, all I need is a farm.

At Daily show with Jon Stewart-YT search Edward Snowden hides out in Russia.
-Snowden in Hotel California you can checkout anytime, but you can never leave.

Its a tragedy. God bless

in thrapy

In therapy
- What are you afraid of then?
- Only the unknown. If I do do those things I have thought of doing, I expect some kind of response.
All I want is likes and no dislikes. I mean What will I do with dislikes? I have searched for the ney sayers on twitter and given my response to them. Why is it so? I'm actively searching for those who think different than me instead of belonging to the group of same thinkers? Those who think alike? What is my problem?
- There is so many ways of saying it but it all comes done to the will and the word. Let it be known what you want and it will come to you.
- Ok, what is it I want?
- To not be afraid. You will have to begin to think more positively. Reach out...

(therapist singing I'll be there...and scene)

Saturday Samstag

Today in the News. Femen got caught by the Police for showing their naked breasts in a Mosque in Stockholm.

Is it good shouting "Stop Sharia" and "Free the women" in that manner?

Heute Nachrichten. Femen wurden (was sagst man jetzt?) bei der Polizei in Stockholm gefangennehmen, für Topless in Mosque waren.
Wird es gut gerufen "Stop Sharia" und "Free the women" in dieses Manieren?

I don't know/ Ich weiss nicht
Do you know?/ Weisst du?

Yes I've been busy

The thing with your fathers 60th birthday is that to make it splendid in every way you yourself, the daughter have to put in some effort to help out. Since my speciality is photographs, editing pictures and visualise, I got the task to do the Invitation cards sent out before the party occasion (pardon my English, my first language is Swedish), I made ett sånghäfte(a songbook- singing before beverages- is it Swedish tradition?) Thank you cards I made after the party. Little did I know that it would take so much time until today to fix them cards. The party was 27th of April 2013. I'm glad I didn't have a big 30th birthday for myself too, too much work, you know. I'm going to Paris instead.
 

embarrassed

Whats up world!? I'm just a swedish girl that love music.
In the swedish newspaper I read today that the EU wish to see  more trainees/ lärlingar in Sweden.
I think its a wonderful idea, but I wonder how to get it done? In Expressen(evening standard newspaper) yesterday Ann Charlotte thought that those who are unemployed should help out in the healthcare, taking care of the old, instead of having the rule that those who have been unemployed for more than 2 years is forced to do meaningless fas3 jobs.
Another voice in the newspaper that made me think was Magdalena, that thought real jobs should  be done with real pay where those who work get to do a real effort.
Mikroloan to the young thinks Claes because it is something that has worked for the Africa countries.
 Last seen Musicvideo: David Bowie och Gary Oldman i The next day video. Them dressed as people of the church, no, Bowie is dressed as a singing profet and it is clearly a prostitute bar. A kid say in the beginning her money for the poor and the hungry. The Gary Oldman hits the poor man down and a prostitute picks up money from the floor. Whom made the musicvideo this time? Who was the director I mean? SO cool. The priest Gary shout something at the profet and the prostitute woman starts bleeding from her hands like shes been nailed. It ends with David Bowie saying thank you everyone and disappearing into the spotlight. (I don't see why there was such a fuss about the video.)
Ciao!

in the news

I'm home on sick leave from work now. I'm not goíng back there...
Something to look forward to this evening is to have a look at the Oscars. I like the glamour, to be inspired of the storytelling in filmmaking. Tonights event is gonna entertain and its Top notch people that are there so its interesting. Just dreamin away from the mundane. And get some laughs.
The pope Benedict recently resigned. SNL joked about an insurance company for popes then, the last pope that resigned before did it ca1400th. In absurdum.
IRL I'm having two Lapsong dogs (Tibetansk knähund) to babysit for a week, while another is on a holiday. Fun. Cheers!

Wednesday Mittwoch

Hey another year has started and I have a job to go to. Single, soon to be getting to that age that in my dreamworld planning I had gotten married before this birthday coming up in may.

8 Januar David Bowie relases new song. I listen to the song and wonder where his t-shirt with the text m/s Norway comes from. Tony Oursler is the director of the video to David Bowies new single Where are we now. I like the ending of the song, the last rows goes - As long as theres sun, rain, fire, me and you.
(Pure and simple. Beautiful lyrics. In my own opinion)
I saw Tony Oursler exhibition when he was in Magasin 3 in Stockholm, must've been ten years ago.
Wonder how Oursler pronounce his last name?
   Fonem in swedish. Ö is like in thirst (oe -ö). Ä is like in care (ae -ä). Å is like in holly (au -å)

Cheers

Takarazuka musikal (This is the japanese version of The Scarlet Pimpernel(Hoshigumi) played by famous all woman company Takarazuka)